Why I’m Not Bringing SexyBack to My Classroom

This year I am teaching all new students, which means they have to learn my rules. One rule that I established last year and will continue to stand by even until I have my own children is that the word “sexy” is not allowed. Seems kind of strict, right? A little too controlling, maybe? I mean, I teach teenagers, they are all about sexy, even the songs they randomly sing in class have the word sexy in them. So why wouldn’t I just make my life easier and give them the liberty to choose whatever words they want to use?

The dictionary defines sexy as an adjective that means, “concerned predominantly or excessively with sex.”  So, if I describe someone as sexy, I mean that they have, before their other qualities, sex appeal. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am fully aware that we are sexual beings and I consider our sexuality a beautiful gift. But the problem with “sexy” is that it does not acknowledge the other qualities of the person.  By saying someone is “sexy” you say that they have nothing to offer except their hot body. You separate the body and soul and become excessively concerned with the body and not aware of the qualities of the soul.  By calling someone sexy, I imply that I am using them for my own pleasure and refusing to see their dignity as a person, they merely exist for my selfish wants. 

What words can they use instead? 9 times out of 10 my students want to say that someone is beautiful, so why not use the word beautiful? The dictionary says this about the words beautiful, handsome, and pretty: “A person or thing that is beautiful has perfection of form, color, etc., or noble and spiritual qualities: a beautiful landscape, a beautiful woman. Handsome often implies stateliness or pleasing proportion and symmetry: a handsome man.  That which is lovely is beautiful but in a warm and endearing way: a lovely smile. Pretty implies a moderate but noticeable beauty, especially in that which is small or of minor importance: a pretty child.” I don’t know how you feel, but I would much rather be called any of the above words than sexy any day of the week.

When I was teaching my kids a few weeks ago, I had them describe their class to me. It was a class of all boys and one boy screamed out, “SEXY!” So I set my chalk down and took time to explain to them what sexy means and what you are implying by saying that. I then informed them that sexy will not be tolerated in my classroom, and the boy raised his hand again and said, ok miss how about silent? I chuckled and said, “I wish that described your class.”   

Take that, Justin Timberlake.